Sunday, July 20, 2014

Rule #3 – Be honest with yourself

Although it is hard for us to admit, we choose our misery and we make it our way of life.

~ William Glasser, M.D., 1975 ~

American actress Lindsay Lohan once said,
I don’t feel like I have any power. I’ve been working hard and trying to get to this position, and I feel like people are starting to recognize the stuff that I’m doing, and enjoying it. It makes me feel really good when my little sister and her friends peek inside my bedroom door and stare at me. [laughs] It’s cool to have people look up to you. But I’m not in a position yet where I can just be like, ‘Oh, I want to do this kind of movie. 
I was more of a floater in high school. I made it a point to get along with everyone because if you’re an actress, people assume that you think you’re better than everyone else. I wanted to make sure that people had no reason to think that about me.”

(This summarization resource comes from the classroom of Kelly Rubero and can be found online at: http://writingfix.com/RICA/summarizing.htm)
Seriously, what can we say at this point about Lindsay Morgan Lohan that others haven't already said?

In the way of background, Lindsay began her career as a child fashion model when she was three, and was later featured on the soap opera Another World for a year when she was 10.
[More recently,] "The 'Liz & Dick' star - who was charged with assaulting fortune teller Tiffany Mitchell in a New York nightclub ...and also for lying to police about being behind the wheel of a car accident in June - has reportedly told her friends who are trying to force her to seek help that she doesn't need to return to a treatment facility for the sixth time.

Sources close to the 26-year-old troubled starlet told gossip website TMZ.com that the actress simply doesn't believe she has a problem with alcohol despite reports she has been drinking up to two litres of vodka a day recently because she is so stressed about her legal problems and the poor reviews for her performance in the TV movie about Elizabeth Taylor, which aired in the US last week.

Lindsay has allegedly told her friends that the fact she recently completed filming three movies proves that she doesn't have a drinking problem.

The insiders revealed that despite being terrified she will be thrown back into jail, the actress will not check into rehab in a bid to receive a reduced sentence.

Lindsay reportedly feels she was the victim of a well calculated setup because shortly after she turned down Tiffany's offer of a palm reading, she noticed some of the psychic's friends gathering around her designer purse at another table and was then informed by several of her other friends in the club that Tiffany's pals were stealing her Celine black leather bag."'
(http://magazine3k.com/blog/12012/lindsay-lohan-refuses-to-return-to-rehab.html)

Does anyone really still care about the course that Lindsay Lohan's life has taken? Frankly, most people have probably heard enough about her antics, claims of being victimized by everyone else, juvenile-level excuses for her bad behavior, and the seeming hypocrisy regarding the person she'd hope to be verses what we are seeing play out more recently in the media. Furthermore, there's increasing public opinion that she is continuing to receive grossly undeserved special treatment in the court of law.

At her current pace, Lindsay appears most at risk of ending up dead before reaching 30 years of age. If that does happen, it will be the result of her own misguided choices. Apparently, Lindsay is not watching the same developing documentary of a 'girl gone wild' that has been on full display and in HD for the rest of us. She is certainly failing in garnering our respect along with maintaining her self-respect at this stage.

When is someone of authority going to sit Lindsay down, strap her into full restraints, pry her eyes wide open, and begin repeatededly administering "A Clockwork Orange" brand of "experimental aversion therapy" that includes watching the self-destruction of a promising young women's life: her own? Would this be the most viable option for impressing upon Lindsay the severity of her problem behavior? 

Of course you are right if you think that a pretty harsh treatment protocol is been proposed here. But, what other alternatives can be offered to an adult whose actions and decision-making continues to be chronic, reckless, and unrepentant? At what point does Lindsay become a danger to herself?

In case you did not know this, Section 5150 is a section of the California Welfare and Institutions Code (specifically, the Lanterman-Petris-Short Act or "LPS") which allows a qualified officer or clinician to involuntarily confine a person deemed to have a mental disorder that makes them a danger to him or her self, and/or others and/or gravely disabled. A qualified officer, which includes any California peace officer or paramedic, as well as any specifically designated county clinician, can request the confinement after signing a written declaration. Then again, what about a person's civil rights?

It does looks as though regarding Lindsay, the consensus is to simply do nothing--or continue to wait until she eventually crashes while we hold on to the diminishing hope that we can effectively pick up the broken pieces and help put her life back together again. Frankly, this prospect is fast becoming the least suitable and a most unsustainable option.

A more favorable yet difficult solution is for Lindsay to give up denying her addiction to alcohol, admit that her life is currently not built to last, begin to properly appraise the consequences of her actions, and make an effort to connect with that part of her soul that still yearns to do good and be liberated from self-inflicted and multiple forms of abuse.

At 27, Lindsay is an adult with complete power over and responsibility for her deeds and actions. Therefore, it is very hard to accept and take seriously someone who is unwilling to give good love to themselves or make the necessary sacrifices that will further their best interests for the long-term.
Research suggests that avoidance reduces the potential for transformation. Lancaster and Palframan (2009) investigated a number of individuals' responses to traumatic events such as illness, alcoholism, and domestic abuse. They found that post-traumatic growth was less likely to occur when individuals avoided thinking or talking about their problem. However, those who did confront and accept their predicament underwent significant personal growth, describing themselves as more serene and at ease with themselves, and feeling as though there was more meaning and purpose in their lives.

In her book "The Committed Life," author Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis shares [her] ...practical formula for change and personal growth, "just do what you have to do. Through that doing, our personalities, our character traits, will be shaped and molded until one day we will discover that we have become the new beings that we had hoped to become, that we are connecting to that goodness in our souls, and that we are on our way to fulfilling our mission in life.

From my perspective, Lindsay Logan needs to "...abandon what may be called the primitive pleasure principle and adopt a long-term, enlightened, wise pursuit of pleasure, satisfaction, joy, happiness... [which is hopeful, positive, and prudent albeit ordinary] (Glasser, 1975).

JD