By Jonathan Dunnemann
The subject of Authentic Leadership Development (ALD) is something
that I am continuing to explore having begun work in this area nearly
six years ago. Being authentic requires that you know yourself. Michael
Poutiatine, Ph.D., as my mentor at the time, helped me to see that, an
authentic leader is someone who is self-aware, has a clear moral center,
is open and transparent, and strives to be a fair and balanced
decision-maker (George, 2003).
Dr. Mike Poutiatine is a private Educational Consultant and faculty
member for the On-line Organizational Leadership program at Gonzaga
University. In the past, I had the good fortune of being a student
participant in one of his courses and subsequent to that, one of his
mentees. While under his tutelage, I began studying the concept of
transformational leadership.
Our mentee to mentor relationship began a few years later through an
unplanned dialogue on a variety of educational, philosophical, and
religious topics that took place through the random exchange of emails.
I would randomly put forth a question and Michael would very graciously
provide a response. At times, we would volley back and forth for a
while and through this process expand on the fundamental topic that was
under current examination. On other occasions, several days, even weeks
would go by before anything more or something altogether new emerged
often setting us in a totally new direction for discussion.
Whenever I fired-off another email, I could trust that at a minimum
Michael would kindly acknowledge what I chose to share. He usually
responded to my comments by openly expressing back to me the very
thoughts that they elicited in him. Michael always left me feeling
appreciated in our developing relationship even on those occasions in
which we held strong and differing views about the subject matter. He
exemplified sensitivity and genuine respect throughout our dialogue.
Thanks to Michael’s geniality, I was able to learn more about my
inner emotional reactions, thoughts, and plans and gain a more
autobiographical self-understanding. As a result, to this day I have a
fondness for Michael that is usually reserved only for family and the
closest of friends. I know that years from now my admiration for him
will remain as significant and appreciative as it is today.
At one point, I began including other individuals that I knew in some
of our conversations. I was most curious to see whether they too would
enjoy the chance to be heard, listen, learn and reflect just as much I
did. In time, many of these other participants found the courage to
begin expressing themselves. I think that the experience enriched all
of our lives and made us each feel far more interconnected.
One issue that I found myself grappling with at the time was my faith
as a “Born Again Christian”. I had persisted for what seemed like
forever to erect a stiff religious back, for acceptance into the good
graces of my local church flock, and to overcome past blunders in my
interpersonal relationships, due to personal weakness and longheld
feelings of inadequacy. Although I did not realize it at the time, I
was deeply fearful of becoming alienated, disobedient or irresolute in
the view of my church brethren. I fully expected that any doctrinal
wavering on my part would as in the past inevitably lead to
chastisement, disfavor, even suspicion. Indeed, this did prove to be
the case.
Initially, I thought that it would be easier for me to simply
conform, be more obedient, and submit without question to church
doctrine. However, I repeatedly experienced an uneasiness accepting an
exclusionary position regarding the beliefs of others, in remaining
ignorant of the normative perspectives of others, and through exposure
to the denouncing of others beliefs and a seemingly collective
unwillingness on the part of a group of people to genuinely honor and
respect the meaning and significance of the religious traditions, sacred
rituals and beliefs of entire groups of other people. In my mind, and
equally so in my heart it seemed enormously unfair and uncommonly indecent.
According to the renowned psychologist Albert Bandura, Ph.D., and the
David Starr Jordan Professor Emeritus of Social Science in Psychology
at Stanford University, as ‘ Agents ’“… [we] intentionally make
things happen by our actions. Agency embodies the endowments, belief
systems, self-regulatory capabilities and distributed structures and
functions through which personal influence is exercised ….” “The core
features of agency enable people to play a part in their
self-development, adaptation, and self-renewal with changing times.” 1 Individuals can choose to behave accommodatively or, through the
exercise of self-influence, to behave otherwise. An intention is a
representation of a future course of action to be performed. It is not
simply an expectation or prediction of future actions but a proactive
commitment to bringing them about. 2
Looking back now, I realize that the decision to address my inner
conflict represented a major turning point for me in my spiritual
growth. Because it provided me with an opportunity to “go out into the
desert” where I could begin to let go of my angst, “quiet the mind”, and
in complete solitude just wait. Wait for what, you might ask? Wait for
the world to change maybe? No. The answer is, to wait patiently for a
clearer, wider and healthier overall perspective to arrive on how to
live at a deeper level of meaning. It has been a long time in coming
but I am beginning to see things more broadly just as they are. I don’t
have to do anything or become something else for them to make sense to
me. I can accept things as they are in their natural form and as their authors actually intended.
The Dark Nights
The spiritual journey is a process that parallelsthe process of life. If you have to let go of lower formsor ideas of perceiving realitythat are proper to infants and childrenin order to get to mature views of reality,then why be surprised if you have to do the samein the spiritual plane?That’s really what the dark nights are about.They’re a passive infusion of divine lovethat assists us to do what we are too weak to do,or haven’t got quite the guts to do under our ownhuman initiative, which is to facethe things in ourselves that are obstacles to growthand to allow them to die byletting go of them.
What was good is preserved or integrated into a higher viewof Christ, or of God. All that’s let go of is the childishnessor the undue identification with human propsthat are no longer useful tools in the spiritual journey.These served us at one level of our journey,but now have to be laid aside.We have to pick up a new set of tools proportionateto the new wisdom or realitythat we’re dealing with.
You also have to deal with things that you’re goingto be embarrassed aboutwhen you reach the fullness of light.When your own interior light turns on,you see as clearly as the hand in front of your eyeseverything you did that was against love,or against love of neighbor, or God,or that involved pride or putting oneself first.So you’re inclined to get rid of these things now,and that means you submit to the purification processand to the treatments, one of which is called,since John of the Cross’ time,“the Night of Sense,”and the other “the Night of Spirit,”which is more profound.Night is a translation of the Spanish word obscura noche,which really means a fairly dark night,that is to say, it’s obscure.It’s dark, but it’s not total darkness.So there are stars in this night.It’s like a Spanish night full of stars.It has its beauty, as well as its limitations.
And so, the dark night is an infusion,according to John of the Cross,of the pure love of Godthat is confronting everything in us that is selfish,self-centered, or unrealistic in that it puts other partial goodsahead of the relationship that we have with God,which could become more and more permanent.
The Night of Sense refers to your basic motivation.The Night of Spirit goes to the root of the false self.What characterizes the Night of Sense mostis not a rational conclusion,but the intuition that nothing created can satisfyus and that only God can satisfyour virtually infinite longing for happiness.This conviction then undermines the whole basisof the false self.
Fr. Thomas Keating
1 Bandura, A., (2001). SOCIAL COGNITIVE THEORY: An Agentic Perspective. Annu. Rev. Psychol. 2001.52:1-26.
2 Ibid.
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